Older and wiser

To follow up on the marriage theme as in melocotons latest post, I thought I´d give you my opinion on the matter. I have a friend from high school, well we´ve more or less drifted apart since then, mainly because I think on some level she is still in high school, if you understand what I mean... She´s constantly going from one serious relationship to another, everytime being more in love than the last, convinced that this time it´s forever. She´s been engaged seven (7) times, once she got engaged twice within a period of two months. The reason I came to think of all of this is because I just read on facebook a couple of days ago that she´s now on number eight. (That´s a lot of engagement rings, wonder if she´s kept them all... She could just have them melted down and make one giant super ring. Sorry, mind drifted off for a while.) To me, I just can´t help but wondering what is missing in her life that she needs to fill it out with this "romantic gesture" everytime? Or is it just that she wants to show to everyone that she is worthy of being in a relationship? That she´s not some single loser who can´t get a boyfriend (please note that this is not how I feel about single people, being one of them myself I know that most single people are awesome ;) ). The other question that comes to mind is, does she tell the guys about her past relationships, if so does the guy still feel special after learning that she´s already done this seven times before?

I do believe in marriage, and call me lame, but I do believe that there is a special someone out there for everyone (or special someones, I don´t believe you just get one soulmate, but more on that another time). I think the problem is that people are just too scared to get out there and look for him/her, that´s why divorce rates are so high, they do it too fast without thinking, without exploring their options properly. You shouldn´t get married when your´re 20. When I was 20 I thought I knew everything, exactly who I was and how my life was going to turn out. Now ten years later (yes, now you know how old I am), I laugh at the 20 year old me and think; sweetheart, you didn´t have a clue! All the things (good and bad) that happened leading up to where I am today, I never could have guessed it. But I needed it all because it made me into the person I am today, the person that I love being so much more than being the 20 year old me. And as for the guys that the 20 year old me dated, most of them 30 year old me wouldn´t touch with a stick. Since I am friends with them on facebook, and therefor know how their lives tunred out I can be sure of this fact. We were in a similar place at the time but now we couldn´t be further apart. Lives change constantly, people who keep moving grow and develope, and it is almost always a good thing, necessary for our own well being. The people who just hold on to their lives as they are I believe are just scared of what would happen if they tried out living instead of just staying alive. People from my past told me how brave I was for moving to Barcelona all by myself a couple of years ago, not knowing anyone or even speaking the language. But to me it was just necessary, basic survival strategy, if I had stayed where I was I would have died, at least emotionally if not physically. I hated my life as it was, gray, monotonous, everyday looked the same. Same people doing the same things. Now my life has color and movement, and I love what I do almost every day. So do I consider myself brave, not really. I mean it was a little scary the first few days in a new country before you got settled, but to me this wasn´t some great big adventure, it was just a natural development of my life. Me going where I was suppose to go, finding my place in life. Of course my life will keep changing and in ten years from now I will probably look back at the 30 year old me, smile and go; oh honey, so naive...