Saturday, February 5, 2011

Stalker is the new girlfriend

So tuesday night I went out for some much needed drinks with my dear friends that I hadn´t seen in forever. Wine, cheese, mojitos and a lot of catching up. The night ended with me running into and going home with this guy who allegedly had had a thing for me for a while (on another note so has his friend, the guy I sent my drunken facebook confession too a while back but that´s not important for this story). So anyway I ended up spending the night and the entire following day at his place, missing all wednesdays classes. For good reasons though, it had been four months people, four months! So anyway he kept feeding me the ususal asshole bullshit; I really like you, please stay and spend the day with me, I´d really like to see you again, maybe you can come visit me when I move. (He´s leaving the country in a few weeks. I know, I didn´t think this was like the beginning of some great romance, but at least it could be a fun two week thing.) So anyway, I made the biggest rookie mistake of all times and completely believed him. Omg, he really likes me, and he´s cute and funny, and a good kisser, bla bla bla... Then his phone starts ringing, and it turns out to be his recently made ex-girlfriend. Apparently they hadn´t really defined their relationship though; girlfriend/ex-girlfriend/open relationship... She kept calling and texting all throughout the day and he kept ignoring her. I was astounded by her intensity, personally, I have a three phone call rule, two if he´s just a date and not my boyfriend. Anymore than that and you´re a crazy stalker. And if you do fill the phone call quote, text messages are off limits. I swear there were about 20 missed phone calls and just as many text messages. Seriously sweetheart, where is your dignity? Anyway, later that night as I was getting ready to leave for an appointment, suddenly the door bell rings. You guessed it, it´s the girl. At first he refuses to open it, but as she goes more and more hysterical calling and ringing the doorbell like crazy, he eventually answers his phone to try to talk some sense into her and tell her he wasn´t alone. Not surprisingly this just triggered the crazy even more and she starts screaming and ringing the door bell even more. So in the end he had to let her in, she storms in, looks at me, does a very dramatic point towards the door and goes; Out! And for emphasis she does it again, the point towards the door and the; Out! I did what she said and left, normally I wouldn´t let crazy chicks dictate what I´m going to do but I was late for an appointment anyway and figured they had some things to work out. I found the whole thing hilarious though, haven´t seen such drama since high school, you gotta love the spanish women; grace and dignity aren´t the key words in handling relationship issues. I called Melocotón on my way down the stairs to share this hysterical turn of event and we agreed this was definetly one of the highlights of the week.

So anyway, you´d think after all this drama it would be normal for him to call or text me the next day to apologize and maybe clear some stuff out, but not a word. So friday I decided to send a text to see if he´s okay. It took four hours for him to reply, and it was very brief and not asking how I was doing. Just a "hope your ok too" at the end. My reply to that message stayed unanswered. Not a word. So my wondering is now, is he back with her and that´s the reason he won´t talk to me? What else could there be? Or am I being incredibly naive for believing the things he said to me while I was there? But I mean, he was getting laid anyway, no reason to feed me all that I-really-like-you-and-want-to-see-you-again-crap.

But what I´m mostly confused about is how could she be the one benefitting from this?? Are we doing this now, is crazy stalker the normal way to behave in a relationship? If so I didn´t get the memo. Apparently we´re leaving the age of The game and He´s just not that into you and entering the age of "the bunny boiler". So all you ladies out there with boundary issuses, psychopathic tendencies and complete lack of dignity and self respect, welcome, it appears your era has begun!